Resolutions, Day 69

Heh… Heh heh heh… That’s the funny number!


I’ve been informed from a few sources that 69 is actually much less fun in practice than people (dudes. usually dudes.) seem to think it will be. Honestly, I can kind of see that? If it were up to me – and it usually isn’t – I’d say it’d be much easier to just stick my head between your thighs, or shove your strap down my throat, and call it a day. Receiving oral feels like one of those things that’s tricky to do in a submissive way, you know? At the end of the day, I don’t think it actually is – restrain their arms, keep their legs forcibly spread, maybe employ a gag of some sort, and just go to town on all the sensitive bits until they can’t tell if they’re begging for more or pleading for you to stop. But the idea of it just feels more dominant than it does submissive.

I guess in the end, though, if that’s what your Domme wants to do, then you just shut up and do as she says. No point in you telling her what’s dominant and what isn’t – when it really comes down to it, whatever she desires to do with you is dominant, by virtue of her deciding that it will be so. This is how you can have subs who fuck their Dommes without either of them being switches – the top, the giver, is not necessarily dominant; the bottom, the receiver, is not necessarily submissive. If you’re fucking her exactly as she dictates, because it’s what she wants you to do, to gain pleasure and satisfaction from you, then how could it ever be anything but submissive?

…of course, that’s all just theoretical, from me. I don’t have much of a clue how these dynamics would play out IRL, in-person – although I like to think I’d still happily obey whatever Mistress says, no matter the situation. And I realise how that sounds – “you’d really obey anything? What if she told you to [x]?” – but, I know her. She knows me, inside and out, top to bottom (😏) – but I know her, too. How could I not? It’s been nearly three years of nearly daily communicating. So I have a general idea of the sorts of things she’s going to ask me, by this point. Not that that stops her from constantly surprising me – and she’s certainly pushed the boundaries on a few things, too. But I’m not going to – forgive the hackneyed expression – jump off a bridge just because my Mistress told me to. Not that I wouldn’t obey her – I just don’t think she’d issue the command in the first place. Those surprises, though, I love them. She’s gotten me pretty into a few things over the years – I could be writing one of these months in the future where she’s led me into some kink I didn’t even know I was interested in. But if it makes her smile, if it pleases her… I really do think I’d do anything.


Jumping back a bit to having a strap shoved down my throat – I was looking around twitter a lot today, and I came across the shop that’s selling that one Deepthroat Trainer. You know the one – it, uh… Well, to be honest, I actually don’t have much of an idea of what it does. The listing claims it:

  • Uses optical distance sensor to track head position; and
  • Includes access to online dashboard to view training results

Which does sound pretty neat! And it’s apparently great for remote play, somehow, and – hey, that’s what I am! It sounds like a pretty great match-up, tbh. The price tag is a bit of an issue, though – it’s about 230 NZD, plus another $~50 if you want the dildo it comes with. And then another $56 on top for shipping! Poor NZ… But then I noticed on their store, a listing for a vibrator add-on for the deepthroat trainer. Supposedly it plugs into the deepthroat trainer and gives real time feedback while training – the better you suck, the more pleasure you get. Just like a good little slut should be! Obviously it doesn’t detract from the price – in fact it carries its own hefty price tag of a cool $130 – but combined, the system does seem like it’d be a lot of fun.

The idea of improving my skills, making myself a better slut for Mistress to whore out to her friends, or even keep all to herself – it’s pretty appealing! I’m definitely keeping an eye on this one. Thanks for reading.

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