House Rules

Special thanks, as always, as ever, to Mistress Charlotte – bringer of rules, fucker of minds, light of my life.

Hi! So, if you’re reading this not long after I’ve posted it, you may have noticed a bit of a… gap in blogs. (For those reading from the future, it’s been about two weeks.) And I apologise for that! I enjoyed keeping things at a roughly-once-a-week schedule, and it’s a shame to have broken my streak. Please, forward your punishments to Mistress Charlotte, and I sure that she’ll see justice dispensed.

The reason(s) there’s been a gap, though, are pretty justified IMO – last week I moved house and got a new job! I’ve lived away from home before, but never quite like this – I’ve got my own little apartment, all to myself. And it feels very… freeing. Not that I was particularly constricted before, but… I can just do my own things, now. The freedom to order takeaways without checking what everybody else wants. The freedom to get parcels without having to do an unboxing for the whole house. And, as Mistress Charlotte so wonderfully put it…

Moreso than usual, even.

See, my lovely Mistress has been excited about this, too. Back when I was still scoping out places to rent, I informed her of what I was up to, and she loved it. One of the ideas she mentioned at the time was that she would start laying down some “house rules” for me. Obviously, I loved the sound of that. But this was also around the time of my first in-person kink experience – the house rules idea never fully left my mind, but between that and all the stresses of moving and starting a new job… It lost a little priority for me.

Until about a week ago.

On the night that I moved in, Mistress mentioned to me that once I was properly settled, we were going to have a little chat. And, a few days later, we did just that. She gave me a list of five rules to live by (at least to start out with, they may change as we go), and I’m going to go through them one by one, so you get a better idea of exactly the sort of slut you’re dealing with, here. Let’s begin!

1. You will wear your collar at home, always, excepting to sleep, bathe, or entertain guests.

This one sort of speaks for itself, IMO. But, if you’re a new reader, or an old reader who likes to be reminded how slutty I am (I get it) – I have a literal puppy collar (as in, for a dog) with a custom-made nametag that designates me pretty clearly as Mistress Charlotte’s property.

Look, there it is!

It’s only been a few days, but I’m already loving the feeling of waking up in the morning, reaching over, and sliding her collar around my neck. The feeling of walking home from work, kicking my shoes off, and slipping into something more comfortable – abject servitude. It’s a constant, physical, tactile reminder that I exist as her property, her slave, her slutty little puppy. Every time I move my head, or take a step – there she is.

Would you believe this isn’t the most puppy-themed rule on this list? That’s right, it’s…

2. You will obtain a large dog bed. You will sleep in it on Friday nights. You may sleep in it on other nights if you wish.


Yes, you read that right.

At what point do I transform into a full-on actual puppy.

At the time of writing, it’s Thursday evening here, and these rules went into effect last Saturday – so I haven’t actually tried this one out yet. Unfortunately, due to logistics issues, I haven’t sourced myself a suitable dog bed yet either. Suitable being the key word here – nobody designs a bed for six-foot-five worth of puppy! I’ve brainstormed a few ideas with Mistress Charlotte, and I think I’ve narrowed down some good options – but for now, she has graciously allowed me to use a duvet and pillows on the floor instead.

I… don’t really know what to say about this one! I suspect I’m going to love it – puppies shouldn’t be allowed on the furniture anyway! – and, really, doesn’t it just seem perfect? A slave sleeping on the floor, at the foot of a perfectly good bed that simply isn’t for him right now? Why, it would only be better if…

3. Cold drinks will be taken from a bowl on the floor, like a lowly slave.

This is the one that has had the most impact on me, so far. And God, do I fucking love it. There’s something so… degrading about taking a glass/bottle of water, pouring it into a man-sized dog bowl on the floor, getting on my hands and knees, and lapping it up like a good pup. Like a good slave.

…oh, yeah, I may not have mentioned my “MAN” bowl on here before? Yeah, I’ve… got one of these:

“Man Bowl: The Dog Bowl For Men” …and also slave puppies, apparently.

Surprisingly, this actually WASN’T a kink purchase! I got it as a sincere gift many years ago, and it’s serving a better purpose now than it ever was holding noodles.

Unfortunately, I’ve had a few slip-ups with this rule – water’s been fine, but whenever I have, say, a can of Coke or a glass of juice, I keep forgetting to pour them into the bowl first. I promise that I’ll do better going forward – and I’ve got plenty of time to improve. Every day, I’m feeling more and more a slave. But, just in case time isn’t enough by itself…

4. You will select one day each week to be laundry day. On that day, you will play brainwashing loops from morning to night, aloud. (Not through headphones).

Now, I should preface this by saying that this one hasn’t come up for me yet either. But… for a bit more of an embarrassing reason. See, when I first read this, I thought “oh, how thoughtful, she’s given me something to do while I’m doing laundry / waiting for stuff to dry” – and so I decided it would be on Saturday, which is when I plan to do most of my washing. The “brainwashing” pun slipped clean over my head, and I only realised mid-conversation, like, an HOUR later. Dumb slut.

Anyway! This is a REALLY interesting one. I do have somebody living in the apartment above me, and unless they’re the quietest person (people?) alive, I have to assume the insulation/soundproofing is pretty good, so no worries about them hearing anything. I’m more wondering about exactly which loops to choose. Enslaved? Matriarchy? The classic “Project Trance-Formation” – Dismantled, Blackout, Overdrive, Whole? Something as filthy as Cream Puff? Or… all of the above?

Whatever I end up with, I’m excited to see how they affect me. An entire day of mind-fucking loops? At a certain point, I’m sure I’ll get used to them – but is that really a good thing? Doesn’t that just mean they’re slipping even easier into my subconscious mind, fucking me up even further while I hang out my shirts?

…I can’t wait.

And finally, last but certainly not least:

5. You will plug your sluthole a minimum of one hour per day, every day.

“Bur Morgan, aren’t all your holes, by definition, slutholes?” Well, yes, but I think we all know this is referring to one hole in particular.

It’s occurring to me, literally as I write this, that I plugged myself when I got home from work… and I have NOT been keeping track of time since then.

Ah, well, I’ll just keep it in for an hour from now.

Anyway – this one is short, sweet, and straight to the point. How can you not love it? This one is perfect for me, and not just because I’m a filthy whore who NEEDS to be stretched open, wide and sloppy, ready at any moment to have my hole wrecked and ruined, pounded hard and fast as I moan with the ecstatic bliss of being taken and USED like the desperate slutty bitch that I am, I need it, I NEED to be FILLED-

Ahem. It’s not JUST because of that! I’ve done a little anal training in the past, but I’ve never been able to do it with much consistency – so this is great! My plugs aren’t the best in the world for training (as far as I know, that title goes to SquarePeg (just look at that thing, god DAMN)) but they’re certainly better than not doing it at all!

Plus, y’know… the whole filthy whore thing.

So, all of that combined, looks a little like this!

I wake up in the morning, reach over to the hinged wooden box I made in intermediate school (it still works!), and take out my collar, buckling it around my neck. I lie in bed on my phone for, like, an hour, depending on when I woke up, and eventually roll out and down the hall towards the bathroom. I take off my collar and put it by the sink, have a shower, get out and dry myself – collar goes straight back on. Then I make myself some breakfast, prepare lunch / dick around for a while, then the collar goes onto my desk (right near the front door) and I head off for work.

8-ish hours later, I walk back in, lower the blinds to a level where nobody can see my neck as they’re walking past, and lock her collar back where it belongs. Then I go to my bedroom, open my secret “slut accessories” compartment, and grab a plug and some lube. For the first two days I went with the second-biggest – now I go straight to the biggest.

(Technically it’s still second-biggest if you count the Hush, but the ridges on it make it kind of painful to just put in and wear if nobody’s playing with it, so…)

Back into the bathroom, do some business, apply lube generously, and bam – one plugged, collared, puppy slut. I head over to my desk and dick around on my PC for the night, pausing every now and then to pour some water into my slave bowl. Getting my head all the way down the ground has an additional bonus effect – it sticks my ass straight up into the air. Sometimes I give it a sexy little shake just for fun, making it even more obvious that there’s a slut here just waiting to get pounded, ravaged, bred – whatever the person using me desires.

Eventually I’ll head for bed, lie there on my phone for a while – still collared – until, finally, I take it off, carefully place it in its box, and go to sleep so I can do it all again in the morning.

And that sums up Mistress Charlotte’s house rules! For now, anyway. If they get updated I’ll be sure to make a new post talking ALL about it, I can promise you that.

And… one more thing. I’ve received some genuinely lovely fan mail while I’ve been running this blog, and it warms my heart to think people like my silly, slutty little blogs that much. It means a lot more than you know, and I highly encourage you all – if there’s someone out there whose works you enjoy, let them know! You’ll make their day, I guarantee it. I’ll be back before next week with something new and undoubtedly whorish – as always, if you have an idea of something you’d like me to write about, my DMs are always open. And, sincerely, thank you all for reading!

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